Monday, October 19, 2015

The Last Post - super Salisbury....


Our last stop on the way to deliver our motorhome to the docks at Southampton was in Salisbury, another old cathedral town on the edge of Salisbury plain, which is of course best known for Stonehenge.

We made a feeble attempt to visit Stonehenge but lost interest when we saw the entrance prices. You used to be able to drive past and get a free view of the site. We now have rampant commercialism, which in the present day UK, is one of the new religions. So the site is now hidden from casual view, the old road is blocked, and to visit the monument you have to first get a mortgage and then hand it over to the Stonehenge gatekeepers. Only then are you transported to within eyeshot of the mighty megaliths.

So having successfully not seen Stonehenge, we made the short drive to Salisbury and were amply rewarded by what was definitely the most attractive small town we visited in the UK. Salisbury claims to be a medieval town and while there were certainly reasonable numbers of medieval buildings still standing, they certainly weren't as profuse as in some of the French towns such as Troyes. However, it was still very pleasing on the eye.


This building on the main street, (as well as being ornately timbered, decorated with coats of arms and stained glass),  has the words "Ye Halle of Loud Halle" inscribed across the bottom beam and we spent a few minutes trying to work out what this could mean. Believe it or not, the building is now the front part of the Odeon Cinema, so we went in and asked the guys on the desk what the slogan meant. They didn't know but took the option of phoning a friend, (their boss) who came down to tell us that it does in fact translate as "The Hall of Lord Hall" who built it in 1429 and lived there. Lord Hall(e) was 4 times Mayor of Salisbury.

We were so impressed by the building that we decided to go to the flicks while we were there. "The Martian" was just starting so in we went, just in time to enjoy about 45 minutes of adverts, that in retrospect were better than the movie itself.
Just in case you are thinking of going to see the Martian, our advice would be - don't. People are always being told that to enjoy fiction you need to "suspend disbelief" but for this movie, you need to suspend all senses and thinking processes.
It was scientifically, emotionally, historically, (and any other word you can think of ending in "ally"), Crap, (note the capital C). And on top of all the crap, were huge layers of schmalz, (done, as only the Americans can do it).

So, to come back to tales of Salisbury. I had a major triumph when I bought a jumper in TK Max and discovered that they had undercharged me by 20 quid. I was so happy, I went out and gave the "Big Issue" seller 3 quid for a magazine. Always share your good fortune.


This structure was very old but didn't seem to have any function or connection with anything else in the town. It was by the side of a main street and quite a few people used it as a bus shelter. We asked but no-one knew what its original purpose was.


This was a nice old building and the beams, roofs and chimneys were lobsided and skewed all over the place. Presumably it was level when it was built.

 
The area around the cathedral is walled and gated, (you can see the gate folded away at the right). One of the gates (not this one) had a sign attached stating that the gates would be closed and locked at 1100 pm, so don't be late whatever you do.
 
 
Once through the gates the cathedral stands in all its glory. The weather that we have had during our travels has been remarkably good and continued to be so here. (Only 3 wet days in 4 months - can't be bad).
 
 
Salisbury cathedral has the highest medieval steeple in Europe at just over 400 feet. There are some rival claimants but these were steeples that were added later, to existing medieval buildings.
 
I always look for quirky items as we travel around and here's another -
 
 A plaque commemorating a Sally Army bandsman who happened to blow his trumpet in Salisbury. Commemorating the centenary of his "Promotion to Glory" !!
 
 
This mechanism is the cathedral's clock. It works using a system of ropes kept in tension using a system of counterweights made of stone. There are no hands or dial on the clock but the mechanism is connected to a bell high up in the ceiling which chimes the hours. The clock's claim to fame is that it is the oldest known working clock in the world and was first installed in about 1380.
 
The cathedral font is also an unusual structure. About 4 metres across and a metre deep, it's of a size where both preacher and baby could go for full immersion.
 

 The inscription on this side is a bit spooky - "I have called you by name - you are mine".
 
One of the tombs in the cathedral was also a bit spooky. Usually the tombs try to portray the dead as they were in their prime and handsome or pretty as the case may be.
 
 
 This one is from the "tell it like it is" school of graveyard sculptors!
 

Another thing that I really liked about this cathedral was the amount of graffiti. It's pretty normal to find a bit of graffiti in the choir stalls, cos what else have the choirboys got to do when they're not being molested?
However, the graffiti was simply everywhere in Salisbury cathedral.
 
 
 
Neatly carved initials on the side of one of the tombs. I would love to know who W.G. 1606 was and what became of him. Probably thrashed to death by the Archbishop when they discovered his graffiti carving.
 
 
And there's no point having a dog to guard your tomb if he can't keep the graffiti artists off.
 
 
This is how Lord and Lady Muck were buried in the 17th century. You can be as flash as you like guys but you're still dead!
 
 
 
The cathedral also has a very complete cloister, (one side, above), that encloses 4 sides of a garden. In an antechamber off the cloisters, the cathedral keeps one of the 4 remaining copies of the Magna Carta and it was on display while we were there. That's 2 of the 4, that we've stumbled upon during this trip. There was a charming woman who explained the intricacies of the Carta to us and included a few interesting details about King John. Photos were not allowed and with the aforesaid woman guarding the charter, I couldn't sneak one. One peculiarity of the Salisbury copy of the Magna carta is that the image of a face has developed in the sheepskin that the Charter is written on! Very spooky indeed.
 
I'll end this post with a look back down the nave of the cathedral from the choir.
 
 
 
Someone, (and I can't remember who), asked me during our journeys, if I liked cathedrals and churches. They'd obviously read some of these posts. I hadn't really thought about this question but the short answer is yes, I really do like them. In almost every place that we visited, the local churches in town and country throughout Europe, gave us a snapshot across the centuries and provided an absolute wealth of info and insight into the social, political and ecclesiastical processes that have applied over hundreds of years. It will be interesting to see where a casual visitor might go to find similar information a thousand years from now.
 
After we said goodbye to the cathedral -
 
 
We wandered past the Salisbury school that is connected to the cathedral. Every boy, (it was lunchtime and they were being allowed out for lunch), was wearing a tailored suit, collar and tie. These were boys aged from 14-17 and it was obvious that they were being groomed, (literally), to take their place at the top of society. Oiks don't wear suits don't cha know? Just another demonstration of the English class system in action.
 
The next morning we ended our Odyssey and left our motorhome at the Southampton docks. Iris had suddenly decided that we couldn't leave her without a name. She was therefore christened "Milly", just too late to drive her down the aisle and through the font at the cathedral.
 
 It only remained to catch the train to London, have dinner with family and friends on Friday evening and say our fond goodbyes. The next day it was Heathrow and NZ or bust.
 
 

 What better way to prepare for a 24 hour flight, than a large Pina Colada, courtesy of Air NZ?


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